Monday, December 20, 2004
I wonder if it's possible to be there for everyone simultaneously. And do you have to be there for yourself first?
Parents love their children. I've never been a parent, but from what I understand, this is supposed to be true. Children do things that hurt their parents sometimes, and parents discipline their kids, but that doesn't mean they don't love them. I see discipline as a method of protecting children from hurting themselves and others. A time-out, or a good talking-to usually work for a child's understanding of actions and consequences.It's a shame, then, that once a child reaches the age of 18 that discipline becomes an obsolete practice.After all, as an "adult," how does one keep other adults from unintentionally hurting themselves and/or others? Other than talking, which never really seems to accomplish anything between adults, the only viable option left outside of incarceration (if they break laws in the process of upsetting someone else) is removing yourself from the grasp of the person whose undisciplined behavior is causing emotional distress, no matter how much you may love that person.On a different but related note -I will never understand why when a person upsets you, they turn around and tell you it's your fault for getting upset, and that you should stop getting so angry, or that you have an anger problem you should work on. I'm not chemically unbalanced, I don't walk down the street happy as a lark one moment and then throw myself onto the pavement in a rage the next. There's always a reason for me to get upset. It may sometimes be miniscule, but there's still a reason.And usually, if I started out only somewhat annoyed, having someone tell me it's my fault that I'm upset because what they did wasn't wrong only makes me that much more upset. Having the same person tell me that five more times can most definitely escalate me into a fiery rage, but I can decidedly assure you that I never start out a confrontation breathing flames through my nostrils.Just to make things perfectly clear, anger is a healthy emotion. It's simply a warning sign that something or someone is threatening your emotional or physical well being by crossing a line. Maybe a thin line, but a line nonetheless. So where has accountability gone? When do adults start forgetting that they are responsible for their own actions? Or is it just that these adults never really learned that there are consequences to their actions? It is a shame when a person never really grows up.
| {Old Posts here}
Parents love their children. I've never been a parent, but from what I understand, this is supposed to be true. Children do things that hurt their parents sometimes, and parents discipline their kids, but that doesn't mean they don't love them. I see discipline as a method of protecting children from hurting themselves and others. A time-out, or a good talking-to usually work for a child's understanding of actions and consequences.It's a shame, then, that once a child reaches the age of 18 that discipline becomes an obsolete practice.After all, as an "adult," how does one keep other adults from unintentionally hurting themselves and/or others? Other than talking, which never really seems to accomplish anything between adults, the only viable option left outside of incarceration (if they break laws in the process of upsetting someone else) is removing yourself from the grasp of the person whose undisciplined behavior is causing emotional distress, no matter how much you may love that person.On a different but related note -I will never understand why when a person upsets you, they turn around and tell you it's your fault for getting upset, and that you should stop getting so angry, or that you have an anger problem you should work on. I'm not chemically unbalanced, I don't walk down the street happy as a lark one moment and then throw myself onto the pavement in a rage the next. There's always a reason for me to get upset. It may sometimes be miniscule, but there's still a reason.And usually, if I started out only somewhat annoyed, having someone tell me it's my fault that I'm upset because what they did wasn't wrong only makes me that much more upset. Having the same person tell me that five more times can most definitely escalate me into a fiery rage, but I can decidedly assure you that I never start out a confrontation breathing flames through my nostrils.Just to make things perfectly clear, anger is a healthy emotion. It's simply a warning sign that something or someone is threatening your emotional or physical well being by crossing a line. Maybe a thin line, but a line nonetheless. So where has accountability gone? When do adults start forgetting that they are responsible for their own actions? Or is it just that these adults never really learned that there are consequences to their actions? It is a shame when a person never really grows up.
| {Old Posts here}
